Thursday, April 4, 2013

Growing Daughters in Twilight

  "Mom," she laughs, as I slouch in the chair, gripping my burning throat.

"Ouuuuuch!" I squeal and slink lower in my chair, waiting for the scalding tea to finish its course through my esophagus.

"You look like a teen ager like that," she grins, shaking her head at me, compassion lining her face also.

The pain has passed, and I straighten in my chair. This life of raising a woman brings laughter, humility, and joy. 

On the weathered grey deck outside, we catch a sunset's hues and the last glimpses of her childhood, as time flits away with the sun. This willowy daughter stands taller than me now, and has a full-sized Holy Spirit in her. He speaks to her and through her, like he speaks to me or you. And I catch myself watching her lately.

"Mom, you're staring at me," she smiles quizzically those days. "What?"

It's just that I see myself in her, and yet so much more, I see her! A woman in a child's body, a child in a woman's body, and a sister in the faith beside me.

How do I raise this woman beside me? With my man-child off to college this fall, time melts before me.
Trying to see if the timer worked, we surprised ourselves once.
Pulling her next to me on the couch, we speak of our journals, of our times in God's word, and the God-sized dreams for our futures.The sun sinks lower outside, digital numbers on the grimy stove clock climb towards preschool bedtimes, and the moment passes.

Placing my favorite mug into the microwave for more tea, I press a minute twenty, and the seconds flash by.

Linking with Emily at Imperfect Prose and Ann at A Holy Experience.

15 comments:

LOLITA said...

Such a lovely reflection of how time flies and see growth in our children and ourselves. I love the way you tell us how your daughter is maturing in her walk in the faith. I could see that she is grounded.

My blessings to you and the whole household.

Jayne said...

When my twins were born, people would tell me that time was going to go by fast. I had no idea how fast. Now, one twin is married and will graduate from college in December, her twin will graduate from college at the end of this month and their little brother will graduate from high school next month.
I'm thankful to God for memories because they allow my to go back in time and relive precious moments. Now, I look forward to having adult relationships with my children and making more memories.

Alicia said...

Oh, my heart is aching and celebrating all at once as I read this post. Beautiful words. Beautiful heart. And a beautiful daughter. Thank you.

Brenna said...

My own momma heart just breaks a little reading this. We are just at the beginning stages, my oldest off to Kindergarten, but I know that I will turn around and we will be there right with you. Blessings to your family during all this transition time!

Karmen said...

Time certainly does have a way of standing or rushing forward. My oldest is about to start high school and it seems like just a year or two ago that I was sitting at her kindergarten orientation. Thank you for sharing.

{4} simply living said...

I am right behind you on this time continuum and I too wonder how to raise this woman beside me. Thanks for sharing my heart today. Visiting from IP.

Betty said...

Jennifer,I love this post for it reminds me of my relationship with my daughter and oldest grand daughter. My Tara is so much like me even in our failings. She blesses my heart every time I talk to her. June 1st of this year she and her family come home for a year furlough, yeah she is a missionary too. I get teary eyed just thinking about it. Our love for each other has been made sweet with the Lord in both our lives. Praise the Lord for your daughter.

Jennifer Dougan said...

Thank you, Lolita. Blessings to you and yours as well! How is your husband doing? How is his job?

Jennifer
www.jenniferdougan.com

Jennifer Dougan said...

Jaye,

It's true, isn't it?! What are your college graduates majoring in?

Jennifer
www.jenniferdougan.com

Jennifer Dougan said...

Alecia,

Thanks for letting your heart slip in to feeling this with me, and savoring your kids too!

Jennifer
www.jenniferdougan.com

Jennifer Dougan said...

Brenna,

Oh, having your first one start kindergarten is a big step too! :) They grow up so fast. Thanks for stopping by here.

Jennifer Dougan
www.jenniferdougan.com

Jennifer Dougan said...

Karmen,

Smiling at the pace of life with you. Nodding too. Thanks for stopping by. May your oldest one's first year in high school be a smooth transition, full of kind gracious friends who are safe and encouraging to her. May she know how deeply she is loved by her Creator.

Jennifer
www.jenniferdougan.com

Jennifer Dougan said...

4 Simply Living,

Yes, friend. I get that. Smiling with you. Thanks for stopping over from the Imperfect prose link up.

Jennifer
www.jenniferdougan.com

Jennifer Dougan said...

4 simply living's blog: http://www.4slphotography.com/

Jennifer Dougan said...

Betty,

How fun that your daughter Tara shares so many of your characteristics, and even a missionary calling. Where does she work? Will she be living near you on that furlough?

Getting to know the women in our family, and seeing their strengths and weaknesses is an intimate beautiful thing, isn't it? Thanks for your comment on my post "Growing Daughters in Twilight."

Jennifer
www.jenniferdougan.com